Tuesday, March 20, 2007

.MISSinG.

im now on shift. but im blogging.
tinking of her. im so distracted. =(
i keep wondering off..
I keep wondering off dat SHIT!.. i mean shit yes!
kena aku and ma collugue NYE TANGAN LER...!
geram ajerrr.. eeeww..
and the smeell still lingers around me..
the pt was wearing diapers. and still ask me to bring her go toilet to passs motion.she insisted on oassing in the diapers. so i bring her la.
i open her diapers only!!... piak! the shit all cum out. argh.
.
WHATS WITH ME?

Dear GOD,

pls help me find her.
im veri worried.

ANIs.

as much as i hate her attitude. i still love her ALOT!!!

pls help me...

what we could have been, 5:12 AM.

Sunday, March 18, 2007

.thePARENT.

there they are. all i want is to see dem smile. i wan happiness in their lyfe.

i pity dem alot. though they're diagnosed with different sickness individually.. they still held on strong trying to be the greatest parents on earth.

it hurts me alot.

to see dem suffer.

it hurts me more to see them quarelling among each other.

why is she acting dis wae?

that has always been in ma head fur the past hw many years?

but his patience has been an inspiration to me.

his patience have limits.

and todae is the dae dat his patience cld nt take it nimore.

my dad kick ma door.

slam his door.

walk towards ma mom and push her down.

and shouted at her..

i can feel ma dads anger.

its so high up.

he shouted like the whole neighbourhood could hear him

i was so frighten.

it has ben a long tyme since ma dad done dis.

i almost teared.

ma heart aches.

im writting dis nw.

cos there they are quarelling bhind me.

=_(

pls mom.

pls dad.

pls quarel no-no.

what we could have been, 5:27 AM.

.frmHIMtoME.

You are the sun. you are the sky

You take me up. take me so high.

I dunoe how. i dunoe why.

Sayin' all rhis just makes me cry.

I've made a choice. to live with euu

To live the life. i never knew.

But girl euu know. that dis is true.

Im still in Love. i lOve wif euu..

I had a dream. i never lie.

U smile at me. and then u cry

Is it a fate. for u and i

To make a choice to say GoodBye.

Pls take my words. its not a lie.

I wrote dis down. i even cry.

I look up high. cos ur the sky.

I never want to say goodBye.

Sweet kan dier.

tu psl aku in lup sama dier.

syg bangat samak lok bang..

what we could have been, 5:09 AM.

Saturday, March 17, 2007

.HAPIEus.

17MARCHO7
the dae. the big dae. =p

my 1st year anniversary.
yes.. hw tyme accualy flies.
reli..dun feel like a year. hmm..

brings bck all the memories.
so funnie.

i like the wae we acualy bring up the relationship despite the ups and downs.
the year was filled with laughter and joy. sadness and anger!

i like the fact dat we build the r'hip.

its like sum plp buy their castle and sum build theirs. yes.. we are ones dat acualy build the castle.
ok. yall dun understand nvmind. hehe =p
org tertentu je faham.. aaaha,

its a good think dat even after a year.. we still have the feelings fur each other. and its still growing.
ryte baby. and its good dat he is starting to trust me! and cindy..!! dun u ever break dat trust jus fur a stupid mistake u make. u noe hw hard it is ti gain bck dat trust huh! i tink it took him bout.. erm.. ... 6mths? 7mths?

yeah.. so long ryte.. haha

ilovehim.... alot!

this rship chop! stamp!.. its not called monkey love kie? =)

ryte baby?

its real love we both toking about.
but im sorrie baby dat todae the dae dat u've been waiting fur dae and nite.
the dae u tot was a happy day. i ruin it all. ermm. maeb nt all. just half of it.

i made u angry. i cause the quarel part. and im reli sorie.
i tot so too it was ma fcukin PMS..!

bcos fur the past few daes i've been feeling frustrated and venting it on him. and im so sorie. iT wasnt plan baby.

and i reli wana thank u fur being so patient with me.

thank euu fur hugging me wen i hit euu and sae i hate euu and wen i sae i hate dis dae.
i didint mean it baby. reli.

wen i sae i hate euu means i care.<grin>

im sorie fur the tears i've made u shed todae.
i dunoe wat i was tinking reli...

i was jus feeling frustrated baby.
i wish i cld turn bck time
but i cnt.

ilove euu baby.
dun leave me.. not nw not todae.
not ever....

tankew fur todae.
thankew fur not oni b ma bf but olso my bestfwen.

u complete ma feelings..=P

muaks.

oh..what did we do todae?

nt much bcos we both have no $$. haha..

he pathetic ryte? =)

he fecth me frm wrk. we head to ECP.

den.. went to bugis to eat.

thats where the drama mama starts! haha.

damn plp were looking at us..

headed to esplanade. dats wen the drama stops. haha

then to ken ridge park. thats wen i gave him his gift =)

and lastly.. to labardor park.

awesome-ness.. chilling.

im lovin it'

what we could have been, 10:08 PM.

oh wells.. out wif him 2dae..

niwae suppose He was suppose to fetch me at 330pm. kie?

ended up to be... 530pm.
urrgghh. so angry.
wif whom? THE rain! yes! y must u rain everytime im out wif him.

idiotic!

niwae.. we headed of to habourfront to eat Taksin Beef Noodles.

awesome-ness!

dats what we oways eat wen we head there.

makan da puas decided to catch a movie....

we had a hard tyme trying to decide what show we wana watch.some arguements here and there. haha

so i decided to go with ''pursuite of hapiness''. hoping its gonna b a great show cos the small little boy in the ad ish sooo cutie-mutie. =p hehe

and oh boy..its an awesome show. sad show. both of us shed some tears.

yes.. he too! soo farnie. haha

he teared on his right eyes and i was sitting in his left. he tot i canot see huh!

i was glancing at him and boy i caught u. haha

kk.. emo him.

but whats emo after dat was?? when i on ma hp.

i received a msg frm ash and nisa.

ash grandfather meninggal dunia. =(

i was so shok bcos...... yesterdae her granddad was acually kind off stable.

oh my..

so instead of us continue with our time together..

we headed to ash grandmom hse..

yeah.. sad la..

hais.

what we could have been, 9:49 PM.

Saturday, March 10, 2007

.BoiFIE.

shaManis

US.

OKIE.. yall have hearing me whining bout hw useless.. bla.. bla.. bla.. sham have been as a BF ryte.. and we have been quareling like almost everydae fur the past hw many mths? haha

okie.

well.. dis month is our 1st year aniversary. YES. time reli flies fast. we've been thru ups and downs among ourselves.. among our fwens.. among gossips and even among 3rd parties. and we're still holding on to each other. YES definitely i still hate ur temper! well.. u've improve so much ma dear baby ever since i cum bck frm thailand. we have less quarels and understanding more. our time management have also improve so much more!

but we still hAve nt work on trust.

yes..we do love each other. but we both dun trust each other as much!

well.. ya. though i love him alot. my trust fur him (guys) is still hard fur me to acualy gain bck. its hard fur me. i would rather not trust a person den trusting dat person and end up getting hurt.

rite? rite?

hehe..

he have not taught me to learn to trust but he definitely have taught me to LOVE again.

he is the only person hu makes me have butterfly in ma stomach and at the same time feels so comfatable being in his arms. he is ma priority nw..

well.. there is still so much to improve on in da cuming future. =p

i love ma bie.

i love ma diddy.

i love ma sayang.

i love ma awak.

i love ma bucuk.

i love ma bang-babg

i defintely love my irsham.

and so.. dis is fur euu.

"if i cld have one wish

i wld wish to wake up everydae

to the sound of ur breath on ma neck

the warmth of ur lips on ma cheek

thhe touch of ur fingers on ma skin

and the feel of ur heart beating with mine

knowing dat i cld never find

that feeling with anyone other than euu''

love euu lots.

ever and ever.

what we could have been, 5:59 AM.

.theNITE.

the nITE.training leave fur 4daes which end on thurs.

SOCCer peeps plan to do a so-called gathering.

so they decided -ladies nite-
initially headed to CHEEKY.chill around while waiting fur the other to cum.no crowd there.so den decided to Double-o.

which is jus a walking distance.
i was enjoying maself but the njoing turn up to be a disaster and frustrating moments.

while i was dancing awae.. i didint acualy realise dat around me was all stangers and sum KONEK gatak nye matreps! >.ma fwens were all no where to b found!skali..smua da kat luar la! geram aje..

well.. of cos sum wld get drunk and stuff like dat. sumtymes i jus dun understand y plp wld wana get drunk and menyusah kan org laen! dey got drunkk and i got scolded fur nt ''knowing'' dat dey BADLY drunk and still able to njoi maself in there wen plp are waiting fur me outside!!
LIKE hw wld i noe! arghh...

so pissed lor.

maeb i oso have to understand abit la dat MAEB plp do dis to drink all their sorrows down.

hais...

me and ernie all wet2 and stiky..eww.

me and yana outside taka b4 goin to ZOUK.

DAE.. FRIDAE. me ma sis, yama and ma; NURSES. too wana have fun. definitely. it happens to us dat we got our dae off on the same dae and so decided to go wild..! yeha.. we planed. and headed to ZOUK. it was kinda boring initially.. but.. wen cums to the end.around 4+ nice songs and nice plp too. yeah start to pop out! aru ader semangat! haha

HE was kinda piss bcos....i went clubbing fur two straight daes.

damn exhausted k! and the dae

den i wen bck after zouk. i had game at 5pm.

im jus crazee aint i?

WELL..young plp jus wana have fun nw...

or u'll nv et the chance wen u grow up later.. haha

what we could have been, 5:35 AM.

she is my cute 15years old roomie in thailand hu acualy take cares of me. hehe. cos im afraid of da dark! haah

we just got bck frm thailand the other dae fur olympics qualyfying round against THAI VIET and MALDIVES .

we wont 1 game and lost two. it was sumhw an achievement fur the team bcos..... we NEVER won international games b4 and dis is the 1st time. hee. ma coach is happy too =)

well..nw we still need to cum fur trng fur chalenge cup comp! its kinda hard cos most of the time my shift clashes wif trng.

and wen im in the morning shift.. afternoon i have to go fur trng.

okie. erm. yeah. to tink positively.. dis is just to occuly ma tyme kk... =p

what we could have been, 5:25 AM.

these are pics we took during our boring trng leave... hehe

haha..i noe it has been a long tymes. have been kind off busy with work and stuff.

have been physically and mentally tired too. though it has been kind of shag fur me.. thanx to HIM and ma FWENS dey made ma day.. =p

WORK:

so far i have been coping well. but i still have got alot more to learn. sumtimes.. i mean alost everydae.. wen i go to work. i whine to maself. asking maself why? why am i in dis line? well.. of coz sumtymes i feel good being patient's 1st and soft side of medicine. but sumtymes also i feel like.. do dis like acualy intrest me?.. i duno. still deciding... but i just hope i woukld carry on fir at least 2years. so the least is i have and experience. den maeb i woukd.. erm.. change career or even futhur ma studies.. we will se la.. hais. dis week is kind of like slack bcos we. the new nurses have to attend dis training fur 4daes. basically teaching us hw to smile and stuff like dat. hais.. it was damn fc**ing bored dat me and fwens are acually dozing off on and off! hmph! wat a waste of tyme! make my ASS bigger only..! these are sum photos wen me and fwens are getting so bored and so we took STOOPID pics just to kill the boredomes. hee

gtg

what we could have been, 4:56 AM.