i jus nid sumone hu NEEDS me..
i jus nis sumone hu wans to noe wat i nid..
i jus nid sumone hu wld be there to sacrifive fur me.
i jus nid sumone hu make me feel exist and special.
i jus nid sumone hu make me feel dat he acualy loves me.
i jus nis sumone to do wat dey sae dey wld do.
i jus nid sumone hu cn jus make me smile.
i jus nid sumone hu wans to care bout wat i tink..
i jus nid sumone hu is sincere...

i just nid sumone to be there fur me in tymes of good and bad.
wen i nid a shoulder to lean on.
wen i nid a hug to make me feel better.
wen i nid a hand to noe dat im nt alone..

i jus nid the one......

sumtimes seriously i feeel so stoopid. i regret doing thinks dat i tot was ryte. oh well.. its lyke almos everydae we quarel. and it nv stop. i reli hate dis. reli.
almos everydae, ma heart aches. i teared. wondering wen is dis r'ship ever gona work out.. or it never will. i gave him too many chance. and i still do. i held on strongly. trying to wrk everytink out. i trusted HIS fcuking words. his fcuking promises! all dis was jus a lie. he nv do wat he said he wld do! I HATE HIM. BUT I love him.. y? i wish i knew the answer to dis.

wen is all dis gona stop! fcuk!
HE DOING ALL DIS EVERYDAE. HE PROOF TO ME HW MUCH I ACUALY MEANT TO HIM.
HE Made me feel like i nv acualy exist ..
he nv make me feel like im special.


though he's my bf..
i dun feel any special bout him.
he is jus a bf.
he nv show his love or care.

im feelings fur him are slowly fading...

soon it will disapear..
all thanx to him.

its been a long tyme. ma tyme nw.. i feel like
as if i have no life. i mean my own tyme fur maself
or maeb me and him. YES. IM nw a full-time shift
NURSE and a part-tyme actif fotballer. oh my.
i noe dis is riduculous. but yes. maeb im quiting
soccer soon. i duno. hais.

i veri tired. mentally and physically tired.
i haven been logging in.. WHY?
bcos of dis laptop. it has soon technical probs
which is sooo anoying!! OH MY..

so i cant reli upload photos! CRAP rytee..
m free tyme..

fur ma fwens..we wen to SENTOSA. im bcumin
to bcum atracted love and adore dat place so much.
if u go there recently.. around silosa. its
awesome!!! reli..u go seee wats there. its so
romantic.. ok nvm.







but i njoi with ma buddies. we reli had fun.
though it was like time limited! =p
i wana go again soon plss..

well.. me and him? have been quareling and
quareling. owaes on the verge of breaking up
but still together. but seriously.. im so sick and tired
of quareling. im confuse and lost.
i duno what to do..
WATEVA..



im fcuking sleepy nw. WHY? cos i jus got bag frm camp todae
@ Police Acadamy. YES.. i hav lots of fun.
but definitely nt nite tyme! i jus so afraid..
duno y. hais. had talk with him >>
u duno him?? the REFEREE WHO WEN TO WORLD CUP.
OH MEN. he's cute. but in old version. hahaha




welll... i'll update soon aik. dis laptop ish kind off
sick. hmm.

c yall around. tag me aik

lurve~cindy

WELCOME TO THE REAL WORLD! ARGGHH..
started work on mondae. WORK k.. nt school. no ITE! no slack. No notink!
i was suppose to be at ward 58 as said by
sister emily. but i got ward66. i wasnt happy in the
1st place as i didint get wat i wanted. it was
dissapointing ah.. but it wasnt bad after all.
i got an A class ward! hu dosent one sia..
working fur 2daes.. oh my.. sister emily caled and told
me dat tomorrow i have to go to ward 57 which is oso and
oncology ward. i wasnt hapy arhh.. 1st of all bcos i was
jus about to get use to ma current ward. 2nd of all.. the teacher
whom i fear most.. is there woth her students!! arrgh.
i remember her saying to me..
''DUN TINK U GRADUATE OREDI,IF I SEE U WORKING, I'LL HAUNT U DOWN!''
fear... I DUNO WHY.. hais

but at least.. ma sis is in the same ward. at least i get sum help.
but i duno.. if wrking at the saem ward as ma sis wld be
a good or a bad tink! i jus hope dat it wld be a great tink!
hais..

i duno y. i still feel so anxious.
im jus afraid dat i cldnt make it.. and i kip making mistakes..!
hais. =(

HELP.

2daes i start working oredi. i still feel so lost and afraid!
i duno y. and wat worries me is HIM. us..

HIS home phone got cut off! he got no hp!
he work. i work. its so hard fur me to contact him!
we hardly have tyme fur each other.
im just afraid bcos of all dis..it will make our r'hip apart!
hais. DIS OS THE REAL WORLD! i've got to be strong.
REAL STRONG!!

i reli need him by ma side. to pour ma sadness. ma worries. ma sorrows.
ma fears. ma hapiness. ma everytink and ma feeling i wld
be feelings ESPECIALLY wen i jus start work.

oh men..=(

IM SO SCARED. OF.... duno wat!!
i really hope dat everytink will go smooth.
even if it dosent. i hope i would be able to acept..
watever remarks be it neg or positive. =?
mus bliv in maself. wats all the 2years trng fur ryte.
i jus hope i cld make it woth less mistake.
i cnt let dis pull ma moral all the wae down!
gonna be jus another hurdle fer u to get over b4 u bcme a v successful knoledgeable diligent professional registeres nurse.

advice frm her. thanx =) i will kip dat in mind..

''woteva scolding or no matter hw much shits u went thru . . if u feel like cryin go ahead n cry but one thing u gotta be strong everywhere u go gonna be tough . . .its better tt u go thru tis tough road nw den ltr.''

BLESS ME.....



A SMILE IS A CURVE DAT SETS EVERYTINK STRAIGHT!!

OH NO..
tomorrow im starting work at NUH.
im gonna be a full-time nurse.
im gona go out here and help make a differnce
in plp's life even if its jus a smile =p.

ouh no.. im so not ready. REALLY..i still
wana njoi. i dun wana start work so soon.
i miss school. i miss ma peeps. i miss having
fun!!! oh men..

no cindy! u have to tink positif. u have to
encourage urself!
HAIS..

now i s oredi wat tyme and i have nt even get ma stuff
ma uniform all ready. aNd most importantly, i
have not even get ma mind and soul ready!
DAMN...

im definitely nt gona choose nursing as ma long-live
career! haha..
maeb a sports trainer.. or... a stewardes. hehe..
or maybe.. erm.. erm.. we will see.i dunoe la..

but fur ma i take up nursing fur my mean time career fur
maeb a year or two as an xperiences... and oso $$$$$..!

wuhu... i cn go shopping. heheheheh
but nah.. i dun get paid as much as i work. =/
hais. wat da do..
i definitely gona miss ma pasrahs and bf.
duno hw busy and tiring dis shift work gona be.
but i realy hope we will keep in touch.

sumtymes i reli feel so useless.

i feel like as if i cnt even tink fur maself 4 wats rite and wats wrong fur me. wats good and wats bad fur me.

it conceive frm ma heart. born thru ma eyes. live along ma cheeck and dies on ma lips.

those tears dat i often shed. i cnt help it.

over and over again. it hurts alot. i cld feel it. hais.

women. are sumtymes silly. jus like me.

they cn love a men so much and nv wana sae the wrd ''let go'' despite dem' treating us like a piece of crap.

and men on the other hand are so f.bustard. they can make women attract dem. and wen they do.. dey cn jus sae they love u but do notink to proof it rite. haiz =/

its so frustrating leaving dis wae. y isit so hard to let him go?

its sad hw u see a guy, they cn b this nice lovely guy in plp's eyes but sumhw. wen True colours dats hides revesls demself. its makes us HATE DEM so much buT still love dem??.

WTH

sumtymes i reli hate maself fur loving him so much dat i tend to hurt maself. i duno if ''regret'' is the correct word i shld use.

plp sae dat if ur patient nw.. gd tinks cum to u.. nt nw.. but in the future. oh wells..

sumtymes i reli dun understand y all dis bullshits happening to me.

i hate it alot! =(

hais.

been hurt too much.

CindyRella

I ♥ to be
taken higher
cuddled and
kisses on the forehead

Talk TO me LA.

get one from cbox!

PUhhh-lease!

▪ Birkenstock =p.
▪ CHANEL bag.
▪ THE 21st birthday!.
▪ bali trip!.
▪ millionaire crumpler bag.
▪ marry a rich MAN.
▪ be a princess :)
▪ and the list goes on..

B.E.B.E

SUSUaidah
Shashalala
Rynnn
HanAbanana
GinaCUTIE
KalysaYAng
velleee
dilly
Shark
raShiqah
Janna
Elfi
Hani
">

WatsPastisPast

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Credits

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